Rescreatu - Virtual Pet Game

Story (want opinions)


Go to page: 1 Bookmark Thread
poteeweet

12:34am Jan 11 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41

A cruel wind whistled through the crags of a damp stone outcrop, attacking anything that happened to be in its path with vicious strength. A lone hawk fought against the odds, golden eye glimmering with persistance.

A single feather tore free of his quivering left wing, fluttering to the stony surface below. The bird of prey faltered, but in the brief intance of hesitation, he was swept away, his talons releasing the cargo they bore.

With a crack, the smooth round topaz plummeted to the ground. The hawk's lone eye dulled with pain as it crashed into a tall crag of stone. His broken body shuddered with a yellow light, and bones found their way back into place.

The bird still was pressed against the stone when it began to transform. Wings streached into pale arms in golden finery, and he grew to a human with oily black hair. The only thing that remained the same was the cold, determined yellow eyes.

An arm reached through a break in the stone, and the winds stilled. Suddenly free, the man fell forward, his arms spinning to try and gain balance. To his misfortune, the man's foot caught in a split, and he landed face-down.

"Ahh...Silan. I see you have finally delivered my prize," a deep bass voice laughed as a tall, burly man clad in greys stepped up a cleverly hidden staircase. His green eyes threw a torrent of hostility at the fallen man. "Did you really think you could pass over my territory with it, and keep it, bird-man?"

Silan looked up, a slight cut under his only eye, his left. "Onior, I knew you were behind all this. When Master Kilado hears about this..."

"Silence!" Interuppted Onior, "You may NEVER say that name in my presance." He spat, "But, Prince Silan of the Creature-Freaks," He said, taking on an evil tone, "I can see to it that HE never finds out about this." With a nod, two leather-clad Lomals, half man, half elf, these ones with a human's corruptability, scooped up Silan by th e armpits and thrust him down the stairs into the torch-lit darkness below.

Silan's protests echoed against the wide walls of the interior of the hidden stronghold/palace until they were silenced by a satisfying thump. Onior nodded approvingly and picked up the topaz. It glittered with an inner fire, and was about the size of an acorn. Not that Onior encountered many acorns.

Onior swept down the steps and slid the iron door shut behind himself. With long, swift steps, he shot down to the lowest chambers, his study and bedroom, which were hundreds of feet belowground.

A stone griffin sat before the entrance of the study, its teeth bared at some imaginary intruder. With a sweep of its powerful tail, the door opened. Onoir walked inside, the entrance banging shut an instance after he sat in a large, silken, chair.

A set of pedestals were placed in an array of positions on a wide map. Only two were occupied. One bore the weight of a small opal, and was set on the capital of the wooded home of the Lomals. The opal was unusually dark, and was sealed to the marble pedestal with a black, transparent material. Raw evil. The next pedestal was on the Pindia River, home of the Euris, a race of beings that had a mental connection to water creatures and water itself. The gem that was bound there was an emerald, each smooth side laced with veins of black. With a horrible grin, Onior placed the topaz on the pedestal on top of vast plains...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Silan was pushed into a dank cell that had very close bars, in case he transformed, and reeked of manure. The unconcious man was swept into a dream. The beautiful plains of Alli-Kilado that usually had gorgeous miles of animals and life, had crumpled into a dead place, with rotten plants and a scent of carrion. Onior approached, destroying all in his path. "Thanks to your failure, your home and all of the other lands will unite under me, or die," he spat scornfully.

Silan woke with a start. His eye ajusted to the dark and he took in his surroundings. he was in a cell beneath the earth, just big enough for a grown human to curl up on the floor in. Before continuing, Silan took on his hawk form. More comfortable, he gazed around. The door was a type of metal he couldn't identify, with a small, barred window at human face-height and a slim, locked swinging door for meals.

Silan sighed. His dream was much too possible. Thaingard was the place where the jewels needed to convene, unless they were corrupt. It was vital that the Alli-Kilado topaz be there, along with a pure-blood. Silan was as pure as they get.

In utter frustration, Silan emitted a terrible, blood-curdling cry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...and dropped it. Onoir's face fell and a shiver shot up his spine at Silan's cry. He would have to have a word with the architect who put his quarters next to the holding area.

With the gem clutched in his fist, Onior stormed over to the holding area with a furious yell. Ripping a spear off the display in the wall, Onior pinned the Euris guard to the wall. Quivering with fury, he demanded the keys.

Silan heard a whap as Onior demanded the keys to his cell. Just a little opening, he willed silently. Silan poised on the wall, talons gripping the rock, wings outspread. Onior threw open the door and Silan shot out into the hall, turning into the study.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's all I have so far. Reccomendations are apprecitaed.




Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
poteeweet

9:57pm Jan 20 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41
Ok, so it isn't that good yet. I am also creating another story i am definately positive will turn out better.



Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
poteeweet

9:57pm Jan 20 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41
Ok, so it isn't that good yet. I am also creating another story i am definately positive will turn out better.



Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
Firoia

10:11am Feb 2 2009

Normal User


Posts: 149
I like it. Your deions are beautiful and the story itself is wonderful. Keep writing. =3



I love you Omena. <3
"If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur." -- Doug Larson
poteeweet

8:23pm Feb 22 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41
Thank you.



Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
poteeweet

9:18pm Feb 23 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41

Silan picked up the topaz with his beak, then dropped it. A thin crack was running across the paler face of it, and it needed Mending. Quickly. Silan could think of only one person who could mend the stone, and to get to him, Silan needed to escape.

Back in human form, Silan slipped the topaz in his pouch and locked the study door from the inside. A pounding sounded from the other side, though the door dulled the enraged screams. Onior had made sure that the door was indestructable in its construction. Still, Silan had to hurry. Then, it clicked in his mind.

So deep underground, the study must have an air shaft somewhere. Then, his gaze flicked to the hearty fire glowing in the huge hearth, and something else there. Or rather; something NOT there. Silan could see a wisp of smoke curling upward and disappearing.

With his key out, Silan doused the fire, then hesitated. He peered regrettingly at the remaining stones. With a shaking hand, he reached out to grab one. On contact, an agonizing spasm shot through the young man's body, and he withdrew his hand.

It was too late. There was naught that could be done, now. So, Silan removed the topaz and stood on it.

When every golden feather was back in place, Silan grsped the topaz in his talons and swooped up the huge shaft.

As soon as he surfaced, Silan was hit by a blast of chilling wind, shoving him backwards into a crag of rock. Silan walked veritcally up this rock, steadied by the strong grip of the furious wind. When he got over the top, he was wrenched into the current and ripped backwards for nearly a mile before being depsited in a huge green oak tree.

As he fell, the sticks on either side took their samples of Silan. Finally, he dropped into a clearing, and ended up with a large arrow pointed at him, from a giant crossbow. Aiming the crossbow was an aging man with thin white hair, but no wrinkles and a sense of youth in his sparkling blue eyes.

"Master Kilado!" Silan cried, embracing the man.

"Prince Silan!" replied Kilado enthusiastically.




Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
poteeweet

3:13pm Mar 1 2009

Normal User


Posts: 41

Kilado suddenly drew back from the warm ebrace, his forehead creasing into two vertical lines as he glared into Silan's face.

"What's wrong, my boy?" The elderly man asked, lifting his bushy eyebrows until they almost met his thinning hairline. They fell again as Silan explained the vital situation, and showed the crack on the topaz.

"Oh. This situation is dire indeed," murmurred Kilado, his voice lowering and his blue eyes flicking fearfully about, to any rustle of leaves, to any chuckle of the friendly brook nearby.

 




Shoot for the moon; even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
Go to page: 1