Rescreatu - Virtual Pet Game

My New Book let me what ya'll think of it


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HarryPotterfany

9:14am Mar 10 2009

Normal User


Posts: 6

Book 1 Arise

 

Epilogue

 

Two very didfferent people, from two very different worlds, battle to  save their friends, family and society. These two people are named Kyle and Theodore. You will embark on the journey that will take you for a ride. Kyle and Theodore are friends that go to different schools, live in the same town,, and associate with one another. They don’t know that they have powers, or that their enemies. There are also two other very important people, Sally and Trisha. They will join the other two on their quest to seek out each other and battle. This is the beginning of their incredible journey.

“Dark Force!” yelled Kyle.

“Flame Shield!” bellowed Theordore.

This all happened a few months before.

 

 

Chapter 1: Kyle

 

“Hey Kyle?” Sally started to ask.

Sally was the all around good girl. Never getting into trouble, always getting good grades, and an outgoing funny girl that everyone would want to be around with. Her hair was a shiny blonde color glowing in the sun. It was long and wavey. Her eyes were like a crystal blue lake in the early morning. She was your average size young teenaged girl,  a height of five feet-six inches. A tanned colored skin like the desert sand, a perfect smile, and an athletes figure. She played many different kinds of sports, like soccer, volleyball, basketball, and she’s also a wonderful dancer. She had won at least two or more trophies for all the sports she played, not to mention her certificate awards for outstanding grades, and perfect attendence. She even won awards in the work of art, in drawing, painting, and creating models, as well as writing poetry, essays, book reports, short stories, and terrific paper assignments.

“Hold on Sally!” Kyle yelled from across the schoolyard.

Kyle was your typical average teenaged boy. Always flirtting with the girls, not paying attention in class but always aces tests, quizes and getting good grades on assignments. He pays more attention to his athletic career than school. Palying field hockey, baseball, lacrosse, football and participates in track activities. He was talented, with a strong physique and a height of five feet-eight inches. His hair color was dirty blonde and spiked up every single day. He only won two trophies for coming in second place in the track activities, two years  in a row, not to mention earning a certificate for scoring a high point average on his MCAS tests. His eyes were black with yellow lines starting from the center of the pupil to the edges. All going to different directions, looking alot like lightning bolts. He had high cheek bones, which made it hard for him to have a perfect smile.

“I’ll be waiting by the gym doors for you Kyle.” Sally replied to his answer. She saw him nod his head, turned around, and started walking to the schools gym doors. 

“So, what’s up Sal? Are you ready for our junior prom coming up this Friday?” questioned Kyle while jogging up to see Sally.

“Ya, about that. You see, um, how to I say this in the right way. You should’ve asked me the week we found out when the prom was, because Franky already did. So I can’t go with you, sorry.” explained Sally. She felt sorry for him, so she gave him a kiss on the cheek,  then she walked away. As she was walking, she felt as if someone was watching what had just happened, and started to follow her everywhere she went. 

That afternoon, when Kyle got home for school, he started to think about Sally. 

“I wonder if she knows I like her?” Kyle said to himself. “I don’t think so. I don’t think so at all.” he said to himself aloud. He started closing his eyes in which he thought would only be a couple of minutes. 

He ended up falling into a semi-deep sleep. He kept on dreaming the same dream every night for the past week. Dreaming of himself dancing with Sally in his arms, mid-air at the prom.

Kyle woke up to the sound of his cell phone ringing. Kyle yawned before he picked it up. 

“Hello?” he asked, half-awake.

“Come to the schoolyard.” replied a mysterious voice.

“Who is this?” Kyle asked while looking at the number the call is coming from. To his surprise, it said Sally. He continued saying, “Sally is that you?” he said starting to chuckle, but he knew it wasn’t Sally because of the voice, that sounded like an old man.

“Come to the schoolyard NOW!” the mans voice yelled.

Before Kyle could say anything else, the line went dead. He then got to his feet, slipped his shoes on and ran out the door. He looked at the tower clock to see what time it was. It said eleven-thirty five. He ran as quickly as he could to the schoolyard. When he got there, it was nearly mid-night.

“Hello?” yelled Kyle

No answer.

“Hello!?” he yelled, even louder this time.

He started walking onto the grass, which was wet because of the dew that was on it. When he was halfway on the grass, he heard something. Before he could turn around, a lightning bolt came out of no where, and struck him. He fell backwards and passed out.

“What happened?” he asked himself while waking up. When his eyes completely opened, he found himself in his room, laying in the same position he was in when he fell asleep the night before.

All he could remember is getting a phone call, walking on the schoolyards grass, and getting struck by lightning.

“How did lightning hit me last night? It wasn’t even raining. I feel all different and weird. Most importantly, how did I end up back in my room?” he asked himself.

“How did I...”

 

TO BE CONTINUED.......

 

 

Morgain

10:54pm Mar 13 2009

Normal User


Posts: 934

Please don't think me mean fo r my opinions. I like what you have so far, but it could use more detail. I find that the pointless little scenary diions and personal feeling make reading more fun. Be sure we can relate to the main characters, too. Just remember: Nobody's perfect, so give them flaws and expiriences. Hope this helps!




Offline; back and looking to get roleplaying again (as well as reviving my poor pets!)
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